So, here’s the thing, I am a stay-at-home mom. I guess you can say both by choice and not. Back in December 2018 while on maternity leave, I received a termination letter without reason (perhaps I will make a separate post on this) and wasn’t too bothered by it because I had already decided that it was time for me to leave.
Being at home with my daughter has allowed me the opportunity to develop my skills as a mother and an individual. During these last few months, I have become one step closer to defining who Tonisha is and what her future entails. I have had time to not only focus on my daughter but on myself as well. I have been able to put more effort into school and church. It has allowed me to redefine my friendships and focus on how I can be a better friend and be of better service. It has been a journey!
Apart from the luxury of being with my family and defining me, I have received a lot of backlash for it. When others do not know your story or cannot comprehend, it is easier to give unsolicited advice and make outrageous comments. I’d be lying if I said that some of those comments did not get to me. There was a point when I felt like I was sinking into a deep depression because of my new body, recovery from childbirth and adjusting to motherhood. Those comments did not make it any easier, rather, they were like salt poured into my open wounds.
Here in the federation of St. Kitts and Nevis, it is not the norm for a woman to be a “housewife” or “a stay at home mom” it is almost blasphemous to many as it has no place here. I did not realize that until I became that woman. So I have decided to just do me!
I have never been interested in becoming my own boss and creating my own job until I had the time to step back and explore. It is amazing the perspective you gain from motherhood once you own it!
It is okay to be a stay at home mother and wife. But the key is to always strive to develop your character. Be one step ahead of those that are too worried about how much you are “wasting away” your life and just live! I am living and I do not regret any of it!
Stay tuned for more on how being at home has allowed me to define TONISHA.